Day 48:

Day 48: Printers.

Ink jet or laser, even a self whittled japanese wood block.  All manner of device that puts ink to paper can fuck off.

We buy a new all in one super awesome life giving printer at the local Best Buy or WalMart, bring it home where it sits in a box for 3 months before we get around to setting it up.  This is followed by an occasional use of probably 3 times a year.  Once for a large purchase, once or twice for taxes and that's it.  Somehow the act of the machine lying in its dormant state makes it turn in to a useless piece of shit.  I have a theory that all printers may actually be crime fighting transformers that battle evil while we sleep.  There is no other explanation that fits how the inert blob of moulded plastic bits can only reliably function for 46 seconds and then die.

Number of copies? Fuck Off
Please run the alignment/ head cleaning utility.  Fuck Off
Check cartridge levels. Fuck Off
Order supplies?  Fuck Off.

Save planet from Megatron's evil Saturn Ray at 4am ? Yes Please.